the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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