Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
