I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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