Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
