so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
