Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
