I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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