did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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