Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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