so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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