Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
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