he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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