and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
