But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I need to wash the frat house off of me
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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