you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
