I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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