You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
