i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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