I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'm at about main and main street
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
