Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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