Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Drunk is not a location!
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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