'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
why is half of my head shaved?
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