grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
