she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Your cock deserves a montage
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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