I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
