She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
