The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
