we're blogging at a bar
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
