Quick, to the slutcave!
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize