Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
