gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
