He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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