the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
