alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
it's like iHOP with fire
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
