Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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