trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
