He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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