ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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