why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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