awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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