Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
