You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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