only if we run a train.
done.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
