I must be too annoying 4 u.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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