Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
