So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
