I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
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