I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize