I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize