Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
