I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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