physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize